Removing the risk of vulnerability
Vulnerability isn’t a very sexy word. It’s not passionate. It’s not romantic. It’s not easy. But it is crucial if you want an honest, open, and loving relationship.
Being vulnerable is so hard because it’s so very risky. When we decide to share our true selves and our stories with others, we risk being seen as unworthy of love and rejected. And who wants that?
So instead of being vulnerable, we hide and pretend to be a little nicer, a little more respectable, a little quieter, a little easier, a little better, a little smaller, a little whatever we think it is that people want from us.
But then we are not living wholeheartedly. We are not being true to who we are or our stories. But our stories are what made us who we are. Those messy stories of our pasts, the rejections, the pain, and the failures- they got us to this spot. They made us resilient, wise, loving, forgiving, and empathetic. We should be proud to share those things but we feel shame.
Perhaps, sharing and loving fully without regard to what the outcome will be is what we really need more of. Just let love and honesty pour from you and, if it creates a mess, deal with that later. If they reject you and leave, they weren’t for you to begin with. Better to find out sooner than later, right?
We are sacred beings before we are anything else. We are the Imago Dei so our worthiness does not come from others. By being open with our stories and who we really are, we acknowledge that sacredness and that is elemental to stepping into our wholeness.
You are enough. Just as you are and with all your flaws and fears, you are enough. When you truly believe that, you remove the risk from being vulnerable. Now you are free to see rejections as opportunities for something or someone new and better suited for you.
Affirmations to practice daily:
I am enough.
I am worthy of love and joy and of living a wholehearted life.
My entire story, both the good and the seemingly bad, is beautiful because it’s made me who I am.